35 thoughts on “UPDATE – The 8.8 Knife – Das 8,8er Messer

  1. Cederq

    Is this of your manufacturing UnF? A cool looking knife! Can you send knives made from to us here in the states?

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  2. Unfuck U

    Yes. I just finished and sold it today.
    This knife is of my new collection of knives which are all exclusively damascus steel.
    Only in this case I made an exception since the guy whom I sold the knife to provided me with the shell I made the blade from.
    Actually I plan to sell most of my knives to America. The buyer though will have to know about all the legal aspects regarding knives in his state or county – as well as customs (is there any fee for a knife?).
    I will also make custom knives and blades made by order with a completion time of roughly two months.
    Within the next two weeks I will add many more knives of which most are in the stage of completion and handle making.
    As you will discover each one of those knives is unique – there’s not one the same as the other.
    I won’t be making sheaths since I would need additional equipment for that in order to make the sheath as exceptional as the knife itself – and I won’t be making anything that doesn’t fit to my quality standards.

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  3. Johno

    Unfuck, your customer has a good imagination! When Cederq orders his knife made, will he have to supply the bedpan or speculum himself? I imagine that he has quite a collection from his nursing days, probably including a few favourites. Just make sure that he cleans it first. You could fashion the handle from your collection of 10mm sockets!

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    1. Johno

      Hello miss Sandy, I saw your comment at Phil’s new tool shed. Someone has a sense of humour, however risky in awarding you that avatar!

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      1. Sandy

        I assumed the avatars were randomly generated. If not, I proudly accept that avatar cause someone thought I had fangs and not afraid to use them.

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  4. Cederq

    I would be very interested in one of your fine knifes UnF. What kind of pricing are you asking? Is there a limit to length?

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    1. Unfuck U

      Please be patient until I put them knives up here on a special page.
      Each and every knife will be presented and described, along with the pricing.
      The length limit for the blade itself is around 20 Centimeters which is almost eight inches.

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      1. Unfuck U

        Ah, so you want to buy no matter what and no matter the cost?
        What a valued customer you are, Sir!
        No brat whatsoever, Sir.
        Not even brattish.

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  5. Johno

    Unfuck, it is good that you have created a job for yourself that you love. I can’t watch your videos, but the pictures you’ve posted look nice.

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  6. Pingback: The 8.8 Knife – Das 8,8er Messer — UNFUCK U | Vermont Folk Troth

  7. Johno

    Dok Unfuck,it hows youi consideration that you converted the measurements for Cederq, even so far as translating to the dumbed-down spelling of centimetre. Australia converted to the metric system back in 1972, if Cederq cares to seek out some old conversion tips from our national archives, he could be helped. Right now, he (and poor Mr egorr) relies on the conversions printed on the back of a cheap and shoddy Chinese measuring tape or ruler. It’s a real shame that they didn’t opt for the higher standards of the $2 tray, as the correct use of the decimal point seems to escape them both. That is no mean criticism by me, I have no such intent. Both men are obviously intelligent, though egorr is a cat lover, it just shows the merciless march of time on two old men. We all must suffer a similar fate, indeed, mine is that there may be mistakes in this comment, due to my crook eyesight.

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    1. Unfuck U

      I don’t really take exact measurements THAT seriously for I wouldn’t care if a knife is a centimeter longer or shorter if I like it, you know.
      That’s why I didn’t take millimeters for measurements and used centimeters instead.

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  8. Johno

    Accepted, Herr Unfuck. I think you know I’m just trying to prick Cederq into rightneus response, using his own tactics against him. But he won’t be stirred. You see what a pathetic life I lead, my sole joy is stirring up Heckle & Jeckle. I’ve considered trying that with Nurse Sandy, but lack the courage (besides which, she seems a nice lady). One aspect has improved: my mobility. A friend collected viable parts from broken/wrecked wheelchairs, and made a working whole from them, and gave it to me free! What a good man, but I won’t name him, to prevent the Stasi misusing the info against him. Now, I should be able to shop a bit, and to visit the library again.

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    1. Cederq

      I can make you a low-rider WC Johno, but you have to come here for it and then go shooting with me…. Oh, and bring your best game ya Aussie winged moon bat… I can out wit you, out drink you, I can out sex you with the ladies and drive a bigger, better truck then what is available in Oz, a true American Chevrolet Pick up truck. All 6200 pounds of it, or for you and your communist measurement system, 2812.272 kg.

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      1. Johno

        Cederq, I’m curious, by what criteria do you decide the politics of a measuring system? As per your “communist measurement” remark, will Herr Unfuck have to change everything over, including the Watts his forge consumes and it’s Celcius temperature, the Millihertz on Unfuck’s tranny playing in the background*, the Millilitres in each of the stubbies in the fridge, or will you accept a custom Commie knife from him? *in an earlier post, Unfuck posted a shot of the fairies gambolling in his back garden, so a ‘tranny playing in the background’ can’t be assumed to be a radio at the Asylum Forge. Not having seen Unfuck at work, I assume he wears cotton drill overalls and leather apron and gloves, but it won’t affect the quality of his knives if chose to wear a pink tu-tu, maybe a leftover from his ‘guests’.

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  9. Johno

    Much of your rhetoric could be true, Cederq, except for the ‘not available in Australia’ bit. Consumers here bought some of the Chicom’s Great Wall pickups out of misplaced thriftness, but not after word got around as to their truly woeful reliability. But Aussie consumers are a hardy bunch, and hadn’t had enough crap vehicles with Great Wall, that is why you can buy Dodge, Chev and Ford pickups here. All genuine made-in-America, all absolute crap that falls apart rolling down a bitumen highway, let alone driving one on our terrible dirt roads (highways on a map only), or to truly risk your life, take one out bush. To do the last bit, you’d need plenty of food and water along for the ride. The market here must be small by any standard, but the Japs have had Yanks beat on price, toughness, quality and reliability since the ’60s with bush trucks.

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    1. Cederq

      Johno, I was not aware American trucks were available in your neck of the woods, or should I say neck of the salt water crocs?

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  10. Johno

    Unfuck, what truth is there to this allegation you’re spreading Communism with your metric-size knives? When Cederq orders his knife (get the money up front, in case he dies!), he can supply his own metric-size sheath: he has boasted of his 302.8 millimetre ‘tool’. If he finally gets it circumcised to the 101.6 millimetres at the end of his knob, he’ll have the 8 inches needed to sheath the blade you make! I was wondering if Nurse Sandy’s K-BAR was sharp enough for the job? Not that such would matter, really.

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  11. Johno

    Older Yank brands like Willys Overland, International Harvester, the really old Jeep, gained a solid reputation here for toughness and basic quality. Then Ford and the newer Jeeps came in, and people changed their minds about Yank vehicular quality, or lack thereof. That generation wasn’t the current buyer, so the big 3 thought to take a chunk out of the tradies’ and bushies’ market for work vehicles. Only ‘Toorak cowboys’ seem to buy them, to show off and pretend they actually go bush in them, the market not satisfied with Jeep and Range Rover.

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  12. Johno

    Hey Unfuck, cool knife. Did you know that there is a lack of phone charging points in rock faces and outcrops? Someone needs to invent a mobile that recharges from body heat. Next time you’re posting pics, Unfuck, forget the knives and go for top-heavy redheads instead.

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  13. Johno

    Obviously I need to look for a nice girl smith. Was it you, Unfuck, who did such a post? If not for the hundred$ I’ve spent on taxis these last several months, I could buy a computer to look at the ‘net. Qld Health would rather fork out for patient air travel to Brisbane, then place specialists in regional centres. A crazy use of taxes and stressful to patients. After losing every war since the 19th century, Austria must be little bigger than Luxembourg now, so travel not so hard for you fellows.

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    1. Unfuck U

      Austria might have lost a war but not her mind as Australia quite obviously does nowadays.
      Buddy.
      Let’s get outside and settle this, eh?

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  14. Johno

    Oh sorry, Unfuck. I was taking my lead from Cederq, about you being German and all. Didn’t one of Austria’s own sons bring you into one with Greater Germany again, back in 1938? You all must have been so happy back in ’89 when The Wall came down, now it just remains for East Prussia and Courland to be returned, maybe a few other borders to be adjusted too?

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    1. Unfuck U

      Well, Charlie Caplin’s twin brother was an Austrian but the Germans made him chancellor. In Austria, he was nothing but an unknown little painter.
      1938 was the year of the “Anschluss”, when Austria became a part of the Greater German Reich. 1939 the war began.
      And yes, it was an awesome moment that inhumane regime of the GDR toppled even though nowadays we have to realize that those functionaries who supported that dictatorship have never really been charged for their crimes.
      As far as I know Gorbachev, the Russian prime minister offered Kohl, the German chancellor the return of all the lost provinces but the offer was refused because of whatever reason.

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  15. Johno

    I can’t watch Jewtube on my Neanderthal.com phone, but now that I have a wheelchair, I’ll be able to reach the library again. They limit you to 30 minutes, but. You wouldn’t send me anywhere that will get me into trouble with the library ladies, would you, Unfuck? I mean, I can’t be like Deathray, trying to clean all that gay beach sand out of the keyboard, apparently his single “old bint” librarian is more ‘accomadating’ with the websites he visits.

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  16. Johno

    “TITS! He’s got that Fay’s titties up on the screen. Get him!” Yes, that’s the sort of trap you were try4ng to spring on me with the librarians, Unfuck. Well, it’s too bad for you that I’m so cagey, you thought to read about my arrest, and caw about it with those two corvids, Heckle & Jeckle. In reality, I was too ill too get to the library today, Saturday. Maybe on Monday?

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    1. Unfuck U

      …and there, my children, you have a prime example as to why The Asylum got its name:
      widespread irrational behavior is commonplace in our societies nowadays but this fine specimen knows how to top it all with a big helping of cognitive dissonance.
      His high grade deficiency also is the reason why The Asylum has decided not to use electro shock treatment on him because the electricity bill would force this institution into bankruptcy. Instead, he’s being fed his medication by the gallons every day after it has been found out that chemical castration didn’t work with him…

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  17. Johno

    Oh, pandering to your North American knife customers’ linited understanding, “by the gallons”, because they fail to comprehend your “Communist measuring system”*. You still havn’t listed the brands or types of the medicine in the Asylum’s fridge, Herr Doktor. *quote from Cederq.. BTW, if he leaves one side of his foreskin attached, he won’t have to rig a hanger for the knife sheath. He is so old and the ‘sheath’ been in such dubious locations, that surely the leather needs no tanning.

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    1. Cederq

      Well Johno, it would be considered concealed… and how do you know? Are you hanging out in teh showers with your new mobility wheel chair?

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