28 thoughts on “Fell ill…

  1. Cederq

    Did you fall far? Get better UNF! knives don’t make themselves… and you still have an asylum to run.

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    1. Unfuck U

      Since you gained entry into the higher echelons of blog maintenance…
      Maybe you could come up with an idea setting up a shop here but leaving The Asylum intact?

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    1. Unfuck U

      I just tried that.
      Whiskey soup with chicken!
      The chicken didn’t like the soup so I shoed them out, concentrating on the soup which I filled in mason jars for convenience‘s sake.
      Ids fascheenaiding how nice zad recipview works!

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      1. Cederq

        Cuz’ they saw the remains of Ethyl the chicken…You drink enough good whiskey and you don’t care that you have a cold…

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      2. Unfuck U

        My poison of choice would be a stiff grog or some mulled red wine but a big cup of Earl Grey with a big helping of Tennessee Whiskey does a great job as well!

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      3. Cederq

        I like grog! and I do enjoy a guzzle or two of mulled red wine, especially when the wind is blowing 50 mph and the temp is -30F or so and snow piled 6ft at the doors….

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      4. Unfuck U

        Yup. Have a fire in the chimney and some real nice tobacco for an occasional pipe.
        Maybe an old hunting rifle at the wall and a good hunting dog near the fire.
        Enjoy the crackling fire while a starry cold night reigns on over a snow covered landscape – and have a sip of mulled red wine in your man-cave!

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Sandy

    Feel better Unf!! We all love and appreciate you. And if it’s truly the flu, try some elderberry syrup, it’s proven to reduce the duration and symptoms of the flu.

    Btw, I’m not a gentleman 🤣.

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    1. Cederq

      I hope not…(wink) I would be severely disappointed if you are not equipped with the factory settings and plumbing requisite of the female form of Homo sapiens sapiens.

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  3. Johno

    Message for Frau Unfuck: if you want Notwende out of his sickbed and back to the forge, just obtain some Aussie Vegemite. Slather it on hot buttered toast and feed him up. As many a European girl has found when touring on a holiday here, it improves your love life by making both of you feel healthier.

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  4. Johno

    Unfuck, look, I didn’t want to have to do this, partly ‘cos it was a military secret until now. Australia was only 13 years old when the Great War began, federation of the former colonies occuring in 1901, and although we had a small population, the gubmint worried about potential food shortages. Our scientists developed a yeast extract that was easily harvested and chock full of vitamins. It was mainly used as a tasty spread for bread and dry crackers, or and additive to soups and gravy. Added to our Diggers’ meagre rations, it not only sustained them, but boosted them to go on to trounce Austria in two world wars. Now, Unfuck, should we have cause to do it again, you’ll need to include an extra ‘a’ and an ‘l’ in your address labels, as you’ll end up as an Aussie colony this time around!

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    1. Deathray

      Your scientist?
      Johno, do see where following the science has taken the world today?
      As far as water goes, I’ll put the stuff I’m drinking up against anything that comes out of the ground in Oz.
      That’s before I filter it. That’s right, because I had it tested and it is pretty pure. But hey, I still don’t trust the science. Besides an occasional cigar or a pipe of fine tobacco, I’m a “PURE BLOOD.”

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  5. Johno

    Nurse Sandy, Frau Unfuck is onhand to spoon chicken soup into Herr Unfuck, and rub some Vick’s Vaporub into his chest. I, however, have no such succor, and although I don’t have the ‘flu or the ‘rona, I wish you’d tuck me in and read me a bedtime story.

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  6. Johno

    Unfuck, I’ve never seen an elderberry, but if you ate more onions and garlic, a bit of Vegemite would ensure that you never caught the dreaded lurgy. BTW, I wouldn’t take health advice from somebody that frolics in and drinks from a beavers’ bathtub, they poop, piss and fornicate in there. Still, it hasn’t killed him, yet. He probably has more antibodies and white cells in his blood supply than red ones. Have you added sweet-lemons to your intake of whisky, or whiskey?

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  7. Johno

    A pure blood, eh? That means three possible things: 1. The holes your army buddies poked into your issue frangers were redundant, as your hooker was clean. 2. Sasquatch chicks don’t carry the clap, and you’re otherwise celibate. 3. The docs all lied, and you’re in a long-term study of syphilis and it’s brain rot. If you start agreeing with Joe Biden, I’d go for no.3. It’s no use slinging off at you blokes, how could any insult compare with having old maggot-brains Biden representing your country to the world?

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    1. Deathray

      You know Johno, I didn’t think there was much difference between the asshats running both our countries up until the minute “OLD BLACK JOE” shit his pants.
      Now?
      You just might be a a little better shape than we are here.

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    2. Deathray

      Johno, if you’re capable of getting that antiquated device you use to get on brighteon.com
      In the search bar, check out EK the Urban Yeti.
      You’ll find that the two of you have much in common.

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  8. Johno

    Oh, so he really *did* shit his pants when presented to Francine the Romish? Maybe some foggy recollection of his time as an altar boy prompted a gush of joy? You’d think that his handlers would know his proclivities by now, or maybe they fed him up with chocolate Laxettes all morning! Yummy choccies, Joe, eat them up quick, before Satan-in-the-Vatican gets them! I better watch it, Austrians are big on that whole Romish cult thing. Adolf was dead right on two things, he said:1. “Catholics, pah! Like the Juden, but with foreskins.” Well, he didn’t really, but he could have, he wasn’t too fond of them. Speaking of Hitler, I wonder if Cederq’s polished jackboots still go squee-eeck as he struts before the laptop, with thumbs hooked on his Sam Browne? Phil created a monster, he’ll have runic slashes on his high collar next.

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  9. Cederq

    Just on my knife… When I took off the lean green machines uniform I vowed to never wear a uniform again, WOLVERINES!

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    1. Deathray

      Doesn’t mean that you can’t have a couple magnetic door signs made up with them.
      The 2 slashes and BFYTW certainly do seem fitting.
      Living out in the high prairie and all, its not like many people would see it.
      Those who do may not be all that opposed.

      Believe it or not, that would draw fire where I’m at.

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      1. Cederq

        Here too, we have a lot of those pesky Norwegians about… The Germans are further south in Nebraska and north… North Dakota

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